- February 15th, 2012
Well, it's taken a while this night to get to my LJ page. I assume the reason is that yesterday Saint Valentine's Day was celebrated, and, probably, those lucky who are in love keep talking to each other via Internet.
I suppose that everyone in their life thought a number of times about questions for which they did not find answers, no matter how hard they may have tried. The questions differ for different people, and what is an unresolved problem for someone is a piece of cake for another.
What I have been frequently thinking about is whether it is worth time, efforts, money and other contribution to reach a certain goal. Haven't we all been in the circumstances that our utmost efforts to achieve something were all in vain? The matter can be anything: finding a girlfriend, getting a better education, finding a job that satisfies, getting to a certain level in society that is associated with honor and respect?
Let's assume that someone perseveres in doing something, falls down and stumbles, gets back on her feet and falls, tumbles and stumbles over and over again? Does the one begin to ponder after the tenth or fiftieth attempt that the target is unreachable? Or, maybe, that it is a sign from the Good Lord that the goal is flawed and should not be pursued at all?
I have known a person who is of my age, and who attempted to leave Russia four or five times. He managed to study, work and live in a number of foreign countries. Why did he want to escape in the first place? He believed that one day, in a different corner of the Earth, he will start a new life - life he has always dreamed about. Did he aspire for a target that was too high? According to what he told me, he looked for common things: good education, good job, nice wife, healthy children, family home, some money in the bank for a rainy day. Yet the main thing he tried to achieve was peace with himself. Since he did not find that peace anywhere he traveled, no other target was achieved.
Presently he lives in Moscow, has a decent job, was married but now is a bachelor. From what he is saying, the targets he set up for himself early in his life have been wrong. Now that he is an adult who has been a lot through, he is inclined to accept that the goal he must have been fighting for was peace with himself.
When we are storming a wall and fall flat on our face, or jumping high hurdles and injure ourselves, or trying to build a relationship that does not work and get disenchanted with it, ARE WE DOING THE RIGHT THING? Would it not be better to sit back and think everything over? Aren't we sent a signal that what we are attempting is wrong, completely wrong?
As far as targets and goals are concerned, I am a proponent of the opinion that they have to be achievable. Moreover, achieving a goal is not an end in itself, but a means to an end. What it means is that the one who is reaching the goal should foresee, at least in the "what if" mode, what is going to happen after the goal has been reached. This is a challenging task, given that there are lots of events and circumstances that don't let us see three, four, five steps ahead.
Well, some highly successful businessmen argue that if a one is the tenth, but wants to be the third, the one should aim to be the first. I think there is nothing wrong in this approach for these very people. Yes, they keep taking on risks and they win. But that does not work for everybody.
So, goals, targets, achievements, plans are more complex in real life than one could imagine.